Not flesh of my flesh, nor bone of my bone; but, still miraculously, my own.
Never forget, for a single minute you didn't grow under my heart, but in it.

Saturday, November 5, 2011


I will ALWAYS REMEMBER gazing into the eyes of my son on a computer screen for the first time!

November 5, 2007 was a day that changed my life forever!  My dream of a baby for Bobby and I had a face, we had a son! That day began our lifetime with our amazing Panda Boy!  NOTHING else seemed to matter but doing all we could to get to the point we could hold him in our arms and bring him home!  I can't even begin to express in words the feelings that welled in my heart when I glanced at his face for the first time!  My heart lept into my throat and tears into my eyes and I could barely say a word to Bobby!  We had gotten an email the night before from the director of an agency in California we had never heard of stating that she had been told by a client of the agency that we were a family that felt called to adopt special needs children.  She said she had a baby boy that was "hard to place" among other things.  Would we consider looking at his file.  I knew in my heart of hearts at that moment that we had found our son.  I just KNEW.  Before a file and before a picture.  I just knew.  I screamed for Bobby and told him what the email said and he agreed.  Its our baby!  I wrote her back and said we want to adopt the baby.  She wrote back and said please look at this information about him before you make a decision.  We downloaded the information and read it as she asked but we KNEW he was ours.  We sent back word YES we want him.  All of this happend and we had yet to see a picture.  We just knew inside that this was our Noah WesLee!  A child to go with the name God had given us for our first son!  Then I spoke with the director on the phone about what all needed to happen for us to move forward and she told us!  And I asked for pictures!  LOL  We had made this decision and not even looked at pictures.  She was too funny because she did not even realize she had not sent the entire file with his pictures and all.  Amazing enough to us his file and been turned down so many times that she really was kinda doubtful we would truly say yes!  I wonder so much now how and why he was not adopted sooner but I believe with all my heart God choose him to be our son and to bless us with him specifically!  Anyway so early am on November 5 sitting at our old computer that took FOREVER to open the picture we FINALLY gazed into his sweet face!  I cry thinking about that time!  Happy tears now as then for the gift of life God trusted me with! That sweet amazing baby boy is now a sweet amazing active loving, funny, snuggly, compassionate 4 year old boy!  Noah blesses my heart each and every day!  After seeing his picture November 5, 2007;  we were able to travel to pick him up September 8, 2008.  At the age of 16 and half months.  Noah did not talk at all and now my sweet guy though still delayed in speech talks up a storm!  Some is still Noahese but most we are begining to understand! I still cry when I think how long I waited to hear Mama for the first time!  How I use to cry becase Noah could not tell me what he wanted or needed, what hurt etc.  Now he can chat with me and share his funny personality and things he thinks are so silly as he covers his mouth and giggles! :)  He is constantly telling us he is hungry!  Folks that dont know us must think we NEVER feed him.  But he is a robust 40 lbs now and wears a 4T (with some 3T stuff still).  He was globally delayed when we brought him home and he still is but not near as far.  He attends Physical therapy once a week, Occupational therapy twice a week, and one day a week an iterneret teacher, and an adaptive PE coach from the school comes to the house and twice a week a Speech Therapist comes to the house and once every 3 weeks a school OT comes. He has come soo far and is such a loving and fun little guy!  So many people in our life talk about how much joy they get from being around Noah.  He does still have alot of sensory needs we battle and stil at times has some major temper issues but boy has he come so far across the board.  I am so honored that God chose me to be Noah's mommy and to be blessed to watch him blossom into the amazing kid he is! :)  He loves anything with wheels!   Trains, cars, tractors, fire trucks, ambulances, you name it.  He love Mr. Potatoe head and will play and play with him.  He has a menagerie of stuffed animals that he totes back and forth from bed to the living room each day :)  They are his friends and loves and cares for them amazingliy!  They include but are not limited too, Buddy (his panda from build a bear right before we went to get Jeremiah), Elmo, George ( a stuffed gorilla that was Celeste's ), Raffi ( a stuffed Giraffe givin to him when Jeremiah was in PICU), and barney!  I need to try and get a really good picture of him with all of them lined up!  heehee  Those who remember the "table boy" pictures from when he first came home will enjoy that he still loves to climb under neath tables and things.  At Taiwan rocks he started a game of climbing under the table and tablecloth and eventually a bunch of the kids were doing it :)  In the store the other day a shelf in the shoe dept was empty, at least until we showed up , and he is up in the shelf!  I have to be so careful with him!  LOL  He will hide under blankets now too!  I have almost hurt the two us of twice recently.  Once I walked into the bedroom and a big comforter in on the floor and I am thinking WHAT is that doing here!  I almost stepped on it to rush and get what I needed and deal with picking it up later and my foot hits something hard!  YOU GUESSED IT, NOAH!  UNDER IT in the middle of the floor!  I freaked and explained how dangerous that was for someone not to know he is in there.  He just giggles.  sigh!  So the next day I come through the living room and his little fold out couch is upside down on the floor and I am thinking what is up with that.  All of a sudden it flies through the air and bops me and out pops Noah screaming PRIZE!!!! LOL (surprise was his meaning! )  He is also the most helpful child!  He will BEG to help me!  I love it :)  Some things he is ust not quite big enough to do and I have to get inventive so as not to hurt him by telling him he can/t.  Tonight he wanted to help with our supper.  We had a really junky meal but my mother was realy wanting me to make hot cheese dip so we got some taquitos to bake in the oven to eat with the cheese dip and chips.  Noah so wanted to help so we put the baking sheet on the island and set him up laying the taquitoes out on the baking pan to be ready to go in oven!  He was soo proud of himself! :)  He will bring me diapers and things when I am taking care of Jeremiah and is an amazing big brother!  I loves Jeremiah so and he cheers him on like you wouldnt believe!  He tries to help the therepist with him!  Its too cute! :)  He has gotten rather bossy at times and we are working on that.  He will fuss across a restraunt at someone tell them they forgot to pray before the meal!  sigh!  We are like SHHHH!  You are not the blessing police Noah!  We keep trying to explain that not everyoone does things the way we do, but he so thinks he has to tell them anyway.  sigh.  The nurse will get in my van and if she does not buckle immediately or forgets to and I put the van in gear he starts screaming WAIT ... BUCKLE BUCKLE BUCKLE!  When he first started doing it was the first day she rode with us and I did not realize she was not buckled and he kept saying dora (dont ask me why he called her dora cuz its not her name , LOL) anyway he kept saying dora buckle over and over and we were not understanding what he was saying and he was crying his eyes out before I finally figured it out.  He does at times try to yell at us with his little anger he gets going and we have to deal with that.  But that is so much better than it use to be and now I can usually get him to calm down and talk to me.  He is a very compassionate boy and when he has had a big fit or gotten in trouble after the fact he will come and hug you and say sorry all on his own.  It feels like way more than 4 years since that first glimpse of him , seems like he has always been a part of me.  I cannot imagine my life wihtout him!  It is so hard to explain to people how I could fall in love with hi from the second I laid eyes on his picture but I so did!  I dont' think it is something that people can understand if they have not lived it.  That bond was there immediatrly.  Well, I guess I have babbled on enough about my amazing Panda boy!  He is so cute, he will say Jeremiah frogie, me Panda!  LOL  He KNOWS that he is my panda boy! And he picks out panda stuff on tv, in stores, in toys r us catalog, on clothes, etc.  He loves them! :)  His little collection is growing! Thanks for reading this far if you did and now I leave you with some pictures :) 

I know its not even his entire face but he is just so beautiful :)

Noah holding a friends baby!  He is so loving and gentle and caring! 

my sweet playful boy!

lol, I looked up and there he was!  LOL

This was taken during Jeremiah's last PICU stay!  Aint he handsome! :)

Noah and Nanny (my mama)

hangin with the big boys in Mississippi!

Noah and his Aunt Liz!  She has won his heart! 

Singing and playing with Aunt Liz!

So excited to be going on an outing!

our family together at Kari Jobe Night of Worship waiting on it to start!  I ADORE his sweet smile in the picture! :)

Ready for Church last Sunday!  Jeremiah was smiling and Noah smiling and talking to him!

This is what I got when I asked him to PLEASE look at the camera and smile, since Jeremiah was actually smiling!  I so wanted one of both of them looking and smiling.  He was determined NOT to smile!  sigh Me and my big mouth!

Hallelujah Night!  My sweet frogie and Panda being Elmo and Cookie Monster for an evening :)

LOVE the smile :)

love this shot

Thanks to all our friends who have followed since we began our journey to Noah and to all those who have joined in along the journey of life with Noah! :)  Thanks for caring about our family!  We send you kisses in the wind!
THE WAIT FOR NOAH IS OVER!!!! November 3, 2007~September 8, 2008 First heard about Noah~Noah in our Arms!
April 1, 2009~ June 7, 2010 First committed to Jeremiah~Jeremiah in our Arms!

The FIRST Picture we EVER saw!

The FIRST Picture we EVER saw!
Noah WesLee 5 months old

The First Picture we ever saw of:

The First Picture  we ever saw of:
Jeremiah Harold Sisemore ~1 year

Kisses in the Wind

I hold you in my heart and touch you in my dreams.
You are here each day with me, at least that's how it seems.

I know you wonder where we are... what's taking us so long.
But remember child, I love you so and God will keep you strong.

Now go outside and feel the breeze and let it touch your skin...Because tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind.

May God hold you in His hand until I can be with you.
I promise you, my darling, I'm doing all that I can do.

Very soon, you'll have a family for real, not just pretend.But for tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind.

May God wrap you in His arms and hold you very tight.
And let the angels bring the kisses that I sent to you each night.

When Love Takes You In!