Not flesh of my flesh, nor bone of my bone; but, still miraculously, my own.
Never forget, for a single minute you didn't grow under my heart, but in it.

Friday, October 24, 2008

Breakthroughs and breakdowns and germies

Noah has been home 6 weeks Today! And with us for 6 weeks and 4 days!

Life with Noah is the most wonderful experience I could have ever imagined! I had no clue how wonderful (though very difficult at times) it would be. It amazes me how I can love this little creature more adn more adn more each day. I think how can I possibly love him any more and then I do! Just like with my daughter! It is amazing to me how God gives us that capacity to love! I look upon her face and am so amazed at the woman of God she has become! I am HOPING to have some pictures of Celeste to share soon though she always makes faces at me when I try and take pictures rather than smile! Twenty year old are something else! :) heehee Noah is so different than Celeste ever was. He is DEFINTLY a boy. He is much rougher, much harder in ways and easier in others! I did not think it was possible to be a more worrisome mother than I was with Celeste. I mean I was so young and the circumstances in our life were so not good, but I promose you I worry MORE about Noah than I ever did Celeste even as a preemie! I guess it is in part because he was adopted, in part because we are not positive if he has Fragile X or a form of mental retardation or not. We are not positive if he will speak or not. So I guess everythinc concerns me and I want so much more to be the best mamma I can to him, the mama I feel he so deserves and I feel totally inadequate at times to be that for him! Celeste was termed a "strong willed child" by folks in my life at that time. I beg to differ now that I have panda boy! heehee Now HE is strong willed! Much more stubborn that she ever was and that is saying so much! lol :) At times when he is so fussy I am so worried he is unhappy here but at other times I am so totally amazed at how well he is doing for ONLY being here in America for 6 weeks and with us just a few days longer! I mean his life it totally different than it was before. I wonder if he remembers still that we took him away from everyone and everything he knew? We have had a recent breakthrough! Here is a picture to prove it!

Here is my sweet panda boy HAPPILY playing in the exersaucer!!! It was a total fluke that he is even in there at that point. I had babysat for a lady and her 11 month old was in the exersaucer playing happy. WELL! Noah was so jealous and would come over and play with the toys from outside it! So after they picked the baby up I was cleaning the exersaucer and Noah comes up and is all tryin to play, so I put him in it! Fully expecting meldown city! To my surprise he played happily! I of course was right besdie him but the day may come where I can sweep the floor or something with him happily playing! :)

All the toys in the house and he wants to do wash! heehee :)
Here we are playing happy at the hospital waiting room the other day while our nephew was in surgery! This lasted until Noah got sleepy! He still refuses to go to sleep well when people are around! He went from this sweet smiley boy to a screaming, hitting, biting child and mind you not a tear in the eyes when he was doing it. He got sleepy and so I tried to rock and give bottle like at home, well he wanted the bottle but every time he got really sleepy he would try and get down and run around. Mama was havin no part of him running in the hospital. He had to be in someone's arms or the stroller. Well he really wanted to run because he knew any other way he would fall asleep. I left poor Bobby watching neice and nephew alone so I could try and calm him and get him to sleep. I tried to find a waiting room in the hospital with nobodyin it but no luck. I took him outside and tried to rock him, walk him, and on and on it went. He just screamed. A lady in the next building came out thinking he was hurt! I said no, its a fit and she was like do you want some crackers! heehee I was like no we have a bunch of finger foods, he is tired and fighting it and then I showed her no tears! She was like oh my! to tell you it did so worry me that hear I am standing with a child of Taiwan decnet and I am american and of course he looks NOTHING like me! I worried someone would think I stole him from his real mom and that was why he was pitching a fit. Have you ever worried about that BTDT moms? Anyway, Noah NEVER did take a nap! I woudl get him calmed down for a bit but as soon as he got really drowsy again the entire thing would start over. I ended up texting other adoptive moms for prayer! I am so blessed to have friends who care about us! :) I wish I knew why it is so hard for Noah to sleep when others are around. At home even if there are more than just the normal he will fight and I have to take him in a room just me and him. He wont go down for anyone but me or take a bottle from anyone but me either. We have the same thing at Church but I just take him off with just me and him and he goes down. Anyway, this is the main area he has gotten worse in and not better. I guess it is just him. It so breaks my heart for him to hit and bite and just so despretly fight me. We are learning about that, he will hit and pull hair and bite other times too but not as hard. Hitting is getting better overall. hair pulling is not and biting is mainly me when he is mad at someone else! go figure! If baba leaves, he will bite me! but again it is not hard bites like the sleep fit bite but I still tell him no because I dont want them to get harder! Anyway we had to go to the car dealership after the hospital cuz the car started messing up and on the way in the car Noah fell asleep. I was able to take him out of car seat and move him to stroller and he did not move! heehee After sleeping awhile he did end up moving his feet! Check out the picture!

Is that not the cutest thing?? :) heehee It makes his feet look SOOO much bigger than they are! I guess cuz they are the closest thing to the camera!
Here are a few more pictures to share! :)

This is the cutest little smirk I get sometimes! He is so adorable! :)

He has decided Jei Jei is a bridge here! He didnt even try to get her to move, just went under :)
We have been bitten by germies here :( Noah and mama. Mama worse so today especially. I'm not sure how well you will able to see it but his nose is so runny. I wipe it and seconds later it is like this again. Poor baby :( only 1 day did it slow him down. I mean he is crabby and all but stil moving! Busy busy!

this one I just wanted to share because he is so beautiful! I just adore looking at that face. Can you see how red he is under his nose and on his cheeks? part if fever and part is from us wiping his nose so much.
Well, my snuggle bunny is wanting in mama's lap so I best scoot.
WE send you blessings and kisses in the wind!

Monday, October 20, 2008

Shower of Blessings!

Tonight I was blessed with my very own BABY SHOWER!!!!! :) I was so incredibly thrilled that I got a shower :) Since I did not have a pregnancy or even adopt a newborn it is not something that I would have thought would happen but I AM SO THRILLED IT DID! It was a wonderful time! We had wonderful bean soup over rice and some chips and spinach dip and pasta salad and of course cake! :) My dear friend Cassie MADE 2 cakes for us! She made my FAVORITE buttercream icing! :) She was so sweet and had to make this cake for Noah since he has been affectionatly known as Panda Boy for so long! :) Is it not the cutest thing???? :)

She is so talented! :) and let me clue you, it was soooo yummy! and the leftovers of this one are in my kitchen! heehee

Here is the other cake she made also! :) Again YUMMO! :) I just love reading it! It still seems unreal to me at times that Noah is FINALLY here! :)
My Sister in Law Michelle made this daiper cake for a centerpeice! :) I was so impressed! She and her whole family helped! :) I am told their are pictures of it in progress and I PRAY I will get some copies soon! :) She KNOWS me so well, she came in sayin YOU HAVE TO TAKE IT APART AND USE THE DIAPERS! heehee She knows I would be so tempted to just set it up at the house and look at it forever and never take it apart! ( I guess the welcome home Noah sign and door bow still being over a month later could have given her that idea! heehee)

Noah is doing SOOO well! He was of course the center of attention and LOVED it! He is getting SOOO comfortable at church! I was SOOOO excited when I arrived at the Church because as I was getting him out of his car seat and he looked up and realized where we were HE GRINNED SO BIG! :) HE KNEW WE WERE AT CHURCH!!!!!!! :)

Noah's Aunt Lisa gets to meet him for the first time! :) She is so fun and I am sure many years of fun times await Noah and Aunt Lisa at reunions and other family get togethers :)

Noah coming back to base (heehee mama is base). It is so cute how he ventures out but will come toddlin back to make sure I am still there! :) Boy howdy though if I stand up and am anywhere NEAR the door he is on top of me then! like he has radar or something! :) It was so cute! :)
Mama's good friend Amber and her baby Erin meet Noah! :) Amber and Erin have a special day coming up Nov 3rd! Its there court date for their adoption! We are sooo thrilled for them! :)
I just love all the kiddos that came to share our joy! :) They were so sweet and showered us with the blessing of hugs and sweet smiles! Noah is blessed to have so many little friends to grow up with! :)
Noah LOVED all the gifts and the wrapping too! :) He is a paperaholic! heehee
Here is Noah looking at a card! He recognized Elmo! He was so cute to come and read cards :)
Noah and his cousin Melissa! :) She is such a big helper to her Mom and has lots of experience with boys with her 3 little brothers! :) She will be a wonderful big cousin for Noah! :) That is Joshua with her! He and is little sister Tori just LOVE Noah! They always want to be around him :)

This one made me so cry! :) My dear Friend Sarah made this photo album for us! :) It has some pictures in it from the airport and some of the update photos of Noah over the months! and then room for more photos! I just love it! :)
Hopefully you can read this! It is the incription inside the photo album!

Here is a sweet book from my Sister and brother in law's family! It is so true that we give our children the gift of Love! That is SOOO important to me! That Noah KNOWS how much he is loved by us and by the Lord!

This was a gift from my dear friends Leesa and Paul who also happen to be our Pastors! :) I love this! Not only can I use it for bible time with Noah now for us to read to him, but it is also a phonetic reader for years to come as he learns to read! :)

Here is the inscription in that Bible book!

Most everyone who came brought a package of diapers!!! :) LOOKIE :)

That is such a wonderful blessing! :)

Here is most all the gifts the best we could get them in the picture! There were a few Church outfits, a sweater, a sleeper with feet in, toys, books, baby wipes, picture frames, photo albums, bibs, cups, travel containers adn the list goes on and on! There were a couple of gift cards as well so I will be doing some shopping soon and will have more to show you later! We were so blessed with so much :) I will make a slide show video thing when I have time so you can see each thing and more pictures of the shower events! This is just a snippet of all their is to show! And lastly I leave you with a sweet picture of a VERY worn out Panda Boy! When we got home he was sound asleep in the car seat! I actually took him out and move him into the house and laid him in the crib and he never woke and is still there now!

I so love this little baby boy! :)
THANK you to all my wonderful friends and family who were able to attend the Shower and Shower us with blessings of gifts and fellowship! I feel so honored :)
We send you all blessings and Kisses in the wind!

Sunday, October 19, 2008

Noah is 18 months old

Today Noah is 18 months old! A year and a half! I have had the pleasure of watching him grow up in pictures from 6 and half months to 16 and half months. I have loved bein the one to do the monthly update now! This is the 2nd month bday update I have had the express pleasure of posting myself! :) Noah is doin QUITE well in most areas! :) He spent his 18 month bday at Church and then now at home with the family! :) Noah is still about 30 inches tall and he weighs 23 and half pounds now! That is a jump from last month. He is still drinking ALOT of formula but has added more and more table foods to the mix. He will pretty much eat anything as long as I make it small enough and HE IS IN THE MOOD TOO! heehee He is VERY clingy of me! He definitly knows what he wants and lets YOU KNOW how he feels about it if he does not get it! The pediatrician said give him anything to eat that he will eat and can eat. I am finding that I have made some errors in that area and we are a very gassy boy. Every day I fall more and more in love with my baby boy! I worry so much if I am doin all for him I should, is he happy, is he feeling loved, does he like it here. On and on my thoughts go. I want SOOO much to do the best I can for this prescious creature the Lord has gifted me with! I feel SO INCREDIBLY guilty when he cries and wants me and I dont pick him up. Sometimes it is just NOT SAFE to be in Mama's arms. Like when she is cutting up meat for supper! Also he has taken to if ANYONE else tells him no for any reason he screams and runs to me! When we are out at church I have become BASE! lol He will toddle off to explore or run after bigger kids or have them chase him but he ALWAYS comes runnin back to BASE! It was so cute the other day. He did it so much that SaraJane (21 months old) started followin suit! heehee So they would just toddle with all their might all over the fellowship hall and then Noah would rush back and touch BASE (ME ) and then here would come Sara Jane to touch me too! Before it was over with several other preschoolers were doing it as well! :) So funny! Noah has INCREDIBLE social skills for an 18 month old baby! He still ADORES paper! He is VERY into in and out and open and close! He will put things in and take them out and open things and close things. He loves it! He also adores cooking! lol Sara Jane taught him how to stir in a pot with a spoon in toddler class one night and EVERY time he is in there now he goes to that pot. Mama has got to find him one! Here are some pictures to share with y'all!

Noah WesLee sittin in Church beside mama listenin to Mrs. Leesa preach this morning!
LOOK at that face! He is so gorgeous!
THIS is a decision I now regret. NOAH's first taco (minus shell) at 18 months old! Gassy tummy followed! What do pedatrician's know anyway? LOL
more from dinner time
gettin very good at feedin ourselves if mama makes it small!

Can you see the inside of the taco?? :) so cute :)

Here is Noah in a hat from Bobby's brother John. Jei Jei just HAD to put it on him backwards! heehee

This is a book Bobby got Noah! He was just glancin through books and upon reading this one he found that it is about Adoption! So our first story book on adoption!
Well, Panda Boy is showing his displeasure at me for trying to post this! So I must run.
WE send you blessings and Kisses in the Wind!
THE WAIT FOR NOAH IS OVER!!!! November 3, 2007~September 8, 2008 First heard about Noah~Noah in our Arms!
April 1, 2009~ June 7, 2010 First committed to Jeremiah~Jeremiah in our Arms!

The FIRST Picture we EVER saw!

The FIRST Picture we EVER saw!
Noah WesLee 5 months old

The First Picture we ever saw of:

The First Picture  we ever saw of:
Jeremiah Harold Sisemore ~1 year

Kisses in the Wind

I hold you in my heart and touch you in my dreams.
You are here each day with me, at least that's how it seems.

I know you wonder where we are... what's taking us so long.
But remember child, I love you so and God will keep you strong.

Now go outside and feel the breeze and let it touch your skin...Because tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind.

May God hold you in His hand until I can be with you.
I promise you, my darling, I'm doing all that I can do.

Very soon, you'll have a family for real, not just pretend.But for tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind.

May God wrap you in His arms and hold you very tight.
And let the angels bring the kisses that I sent to you each night.

When Love Takes You In!