Not flesh of my flesh, nor bone of my bone; but, still miraculously, my own.
Never forget, for a single minute you didn't grow under my heart, but in it.

Saturday, December 20, 2008

The Difference a Year Makes with Santa and Noah! :)

We took Noah to the mall to see Santa yesterday! Daddy was working at his second job security at that mall and so we went when daddy was on Santa's end of the mall! It is amazing the difference a year makes in Santa pics for NOah and for Santa!!!! heeheee I was actually VERY upset that santa did NOT have his coat on! I DON'T care how hot it was YOU ARE SANTA you are suppose to have a coat on. I mean come on if Santa can wear a coat in TAIWAN he should in LA! Nothing ever seems to just happen as planned in our family. We go and take him and they take the picture and we pay to have it put on a cd so we can put it on computer and print pics we want and such and get home and the cd is BLANK! UGGGH :( So now I am crying because how do we redo his FIRST time sitting on Santa's lap in America :( I am like they ruined it and it can't be fixed :( Well, called daddy at work and said go tell them what happened. Well, they still had the picture on their computer there! YIPEEE but it would not load to a cd! uggh It took till late this afternoon before they got it to finally load. I HAVE NO CLUE WHY, but anyway we have it now! Here is last year's and this years Santa Pics!
12/13/07 Tainan, Taiwan ~Noah ( 6 days shy of 8 months old) and Santa
12/19/2008 Louisiana ~Noah (20 months old to the day) Jei Jei (aka Celeste~20) and Santa
Noah was NOT happy at all to be close to Santa but was intrigued from a distance! I figured he was going to cry so I was like just get the picture QUICK! heehee Then he was scooped back up in Mama's arms and stopped screaming IMMEDIATELY! So weird how he can shut it off so quick! Gotta love it! :)
I am getting SOOO excited about Noah's 2nd Christmas (his first at home!!!!!! ) I have been VERY busy bartering with a friend and Noah is going to have a HUGE blowout Christmas!!!!!!!!!! Have to be big enough to make up for TWO YEARS!!! :)
We are going to drive around and look at Christmas Lights tonight! :) I am so excited! :) I know Noah may not be old enough to enjoy the lights necessarily but he likes riding in car and listening to radio so he will enjoy too! :)
Also, Noah has a new skill now that he is 20 months old! One that Mommy is PETRIFIED OF! He climbed up on the loveseat for the first time and then on my recliner! EEEK! I have not gotten pics of our new climbing skill as it scares the begeebes out of mommy that he will hurt as he teeters on the edge so I rush and get him down or yell at the closest person too! perhaps soon I can get a picture when I feel more comfortable with what he is doing!
Tomorow our children's Church has a cantata and Bobby and are the Children's Pastors so we need to direct and such and Noah does not do well going to others and not being able to come to me. PRAY that he will stay with Jei Jei without a problem! or I may be having to figure posters and such with him in my lap and him trying to rip them the whole time the kids are trying to see the words! heehee
Merry Saturday before Christmas!
WE send you blessings and Kisses in the Wind!!

Friday, December 19, 2008

"Always Together" but now far apart physically but NOT in heart

When Noah was at St. Lucy's Center in Taiwan he had many roomies that he played with and I know he loved :) He STILL to this day over 3 months since leaving St. Lucy's will stroke their pictures on the computer so inside I know he remembers! I wonder what else he remembers and often wonder does he miss it there. Our agency told us about a sweet and beautiful baby girl shortly after we found out about Noah that was looking for a family and asked our help in spreading the word about her. We FELL IN LOVE with her. We were later told she and Noah were best buds! They were " Always Together" we were told. We began praying for a family for this baby girl and even discussed that we would go back for her if she was still available. After all if they were "Always Together" maybe they were meant to be brother and sister. Well, God had other plans and brought this angel her own FOREVER FAMILY! In the process He brought me a FOREVER FRIEND in Holli the mother of that angel! Breelyn Chia-Ling still waits in Taiwan just a bit longer for Holli to come and pick her up and bring her home! Noah and Breelyn have been separated since September so they are no longer "Always Together" which saddens both us Mama's. We have made a commitment to each other to keep the kids in touch by visits, calls, Christmas and Birthday gifts, etc. They may not be together physically right now but they are in heart, in their's and ours. Well, even though Breelyn has not arrived home yet Holli decided to begin already and we received a Christmas Present for Noah from Breelyn and her family! :) What a joy to our hearts this is!! :) They really spoiled Noah! Below are some photos and even a video to share of the unwrapping and such that followed. YOU KNOW I LOVE YOU HOLLI because I am putting up this video because I wanted you to see Noah enjoying your gift though I look like an idiot in it and my house looks like a tornado hit it! Kinda did LOL Noah and Samuel and my family! It is better now so PLEASE dont look at the house or me just at Noah and such :)

Here are Noah and Breelyn back in April when they were still Together!

Here we go with unwrapping the gifties and all :)

Noah was quite interested in these Santa cookies :) He did not want to let go at first to keep opening! :) heeehee
I LOVE LOVE LOVE this outfit! I will put a better picture up of it when he wears it after Christmas! We are wearing Christmas clothes EVERY DAY because it is such a short time I can put him in them! :)
He was so into this! Look at that face :) He is concentrating :)
I kinda LOST it here! I had been looking for a few specific things for Noah for his first Christmas. A train was one of them! I cried with this one. I was already somewhat crying but I really did just loose it with joy! I wanted him to have a train and a plane since he rode in BOTH this year to come home :) and also a toddler age horse because he fell in love with horses at Uncle Ricky's. I have yet to find the horse. I dont think it exists :( not one for his age.
I had to show my other son in mischeif! heehee We are working on some Christmas things and had some yarn on the table and a bit was hanging! Well apparenty this pup is part cat! He somehow jumped up and grabbed the string and pulled the roll down and is having fun. I come up and find him and fuss Brownie NO and he just looks at me! I grabbed the camera and got this shot. Notice he STILL has the yarn in his paws! LOLOLOL

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

This Christmas and ponderings

I have been thinking so much lately about all I missed in Noah's little 16 months of life before I was able to pick him up and also of all HE missed not being in a family. I have been so strange and reflective and somewhat sad as of late. It is harder than I ever imagined to not know things. Was Noah a fussy little baby? did he have colic? has he always thrown these horrific fits where he throws himself down and bangs his head on anything and anywhere. He does it stitting or standing. Did he do this at St. Lucy's or is it special just for me. when did he cut his first tooth? when did he roll over? the list goes on and on. I look at my baby book and I can't answer so many things. It feels like 16 months is such a LONG time but in the scheme of things it is not. Noah was not even old enough to KNOW he was an orphan. He never knew any different. I have been praying since even before we brought Noah home for the future children we know the Lord will bring us. a part of me wants to someday have that tiny little baby from birth that I get to be in the delivery room with the birthmom and start from the beginning. Another part wants another toddler because I have so loved this whole experience with Noah and I have this heart for the children others dont want. alot only want young young babies, and at that sometimes only the ones that have no special needs and such. Then part of me looks at some of these preschool children in European countries that if they are not adopted at age 4 and have special needs are never adopted and sent to institution to basically die. And I want to bring them all home. Good thing I don't have to make the decision on where all of our different children will come from. Just like with Noah, GOD will let us know! :)

A friend of mine made the below video and sent an email about it out and the timing of it was so interesting for me with all I have been thinking and feeling about Noah's life before us. This video makes me pray for and think about children at age 4 and 6 and older even that are "too old" to have a family take them. "hard to place" just like younger special needs babies are considered "hard to place". So sad to me. But I think of 4 years of missing out on the first 4 to 6 years of family life! Those poor children have no clue what they have missed I am sure but are beginning to get old enough to know that the younger children are chosen and they are not. BREAKS my heart :( Anyway, my friend made this with a Christmas song, This Christmas, I actually have listened to for a long time and she did this to help raise awareness about children and older babies who need homes! Please watch this video and pray for these children. The faces are REAL children with no family. They are children through the reeces rainbow ministry.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Happies and Happenings!

I wanted to share with y'all some pics of some Happies we have gotten in the mail and just some happenings here in our life with Noah! :) He is SUCH a blessing to my heart! He seems to have regressed this past couple days and is back to being a complete clinging vine. I can't put him down, even to walk beside me and hold my hand or anything today. He just melts into a fit on the floor. He totally freaks if I go an inch away from him, actually worse than when we first got him in taiwan. If anyone comes near me with him in my arms he cries and turns like they are monsters come to steal him. :( breaks my heart :( I got up earlier today after putting his coat on him and walked into my bedroom to get my keys and he ran after me SCREAMING at the top of his lungs arms in the air and this look of TERROR on his face. Like he was petrefied or something. very odd. Please pray for my sweet little man :( I dont want him to be so upset. I have gone back to holding him all the time and everywhere we go and all which is fine but it worries me that he had gotten where he liked to walk around some and now none. It woudl worry me he was in pain in his legs or something if not for the fits when folks come near us. Anyway, these pics are all from the weekend through monday.

Sunday afternoon we had an online Christmas party for a Secret Santa Swap we were apart of through FTP Radio that our friends Denise and Matt have some radio programs on. Each of us had a secret santa and was a secret santa for someone else. We all mailed out our gifties to each other well in advance so we would all have them for the party that took place in a chat room on FTP. We would lock the mike while we opened our gifts and everyone could hear us open and our reaction, then we would unlock and get to meet and talk to our people and such :) Here is Noah when my friend Matt was talking in an Elmo voice and telling Noah it was his turn to unwrap his gifty! :)

Isn't that adorable?? He began clapping! heehee :) that we dont have on film as we were too busy laughing! heehee

Here is Noah opening PART of his gifties from secret santa. This is a sweet puzzle with animals for our animal lover :) He really was spoiled in his gifties as he got multiple things including a stuffed panda , bear, Vtech helicopter, the puzzle, star shaped soap and bathtub soap dish! :) Noah has had such a blast with it all :)

As if that wasn't enough fun for early Christmas fun when the mail arrived Monday there was a boxed addressed to Mr. Noah Sisemore! :) heehee Mommy was as excited as noah! :) My friend Barb in Mississippi had sent along a happy for Noah as she calls it and some other happies for the rest of the family.

Here is Noah in my lap as we are getting into the box! Isnt he gorgeous???!!!

Here we are pulling out Noah's happy! A beautiful BIG quilt! :) Noah loved it and we proceeded to play a good round of "where's the baby" heehee :) Noah has this in his crib now. Barb is a very talented and generous friend! :) I can't imagine the time it took her to make this for my sweet baby boy! Here are some more pics of it including the inscription on it :)

This is the front. I love the beautiful Noah's ark!

on the back this square is there with the inscription of his name meaning and a verse to go with it! I LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS! Such a prescious sweet touch! Noah is definitly my comfort. When I am upset just holding and snuggling him and smelling his sweet neck can make me feel so much better :) I wish I was better able to comfort him at times, though he prefers me over anyone at times I still feel like I dont know what he is trying to tell me and I dont comfort him. But it is getting better! I had to laugh at the rest part of his name! that must come later! heehee

This is on the front under the Noah's ark but I wanted to get it so you can read it! :)

Barb also put in the box a tote bag and an apron that say Mississippi! She lives there and knows I am from there and knew that would bless me! :) She also added some Christmas ornaments that I just ADORE! They are colorful balls with the names of Jesus on them!!!! I had a fit! :) Bobby put them up on the tree and as he was doing so he would let Noah hold each one and read it to him and tell him about it and then put it on the tree. Well, when he was doing that with the red one Noah decided that he was not taking that one from him to put on the tree and he took off with it! Luckily mama was sitting in her chair camera in hand! LOOK!

can you tell by the legs he is taking off with it!?!

Noah is good at running now! heehee Here is he taking off after the dogs! Poor doggies! He so luvs them and will try to pick them up. Celeste little pup is so tiny he can actually get it and pick it up, by the ear, by the arm, by the tail! we are constantly hollerin Noah no, gentle! lol I told Celeste she better watch that pup good. We dont want Noah to hurt it.

Wel after all the happy opening festivities were over we needed to get to haircuts! Bobby needed one for work. Now I go on record as I have many times before with saying I HAVE NO CLUE WHAT I AM DOING! but I try. heehee It had not occured to me all the new skills I would need to acquire upon adopting my sweet son! :)

Likd learning to cut daddy's hair ONE HANDED! heehee Look how he is watching! He insisted on being in my lap and when I had to take my other arm from around him he started crying so much :( poor guy.

see him justa hollerin cuz I need both my hands :( so now I have to learn to cut with hollerin goin on! lotsa new things! heehee

Well, after daddy I decided to cut Noah's hair. When we took him last time I was not happy and thought I can do that bad myself! at least I listen to myself. Noah likes for me to run my fingers through his hair on top so I decided he needed to keep his length on top but we were gonna cut the back and sides short. Now again remember I DONT KNOW WHAT I AM DOING!!!!! So I totally messed up the sides. the back is not too bad except around the neck. Part of the problem is I dont have enough guards. I have a few but they are way different sizes so when I needed one size up form what I had used so I could blend I did not have it. Its a good excuse anyway! heehee

WARNING :( these are sad to look at as he was NOT happy! Funny thing is he his NOT crying cuz I am cutting his hair, but because I put him down! lol

My poor baby boy!

Jei Jei was so sweet to help hold him and Daddy was photographer :)
Ok, safe in mama's arms!

LOOK at that face!!! HOW did I get so lucky to get such an amazing baby!??????? His face just radiates light and joy! do you see it?? He is my panda boy! :) the cut again makes him look older which I hate but at least it is neat though with my mess ups on the side and the neck it not as it shoudl be :( I may pull the cutters back out and try and fix it soon! or maybe leave bad enough alone LOL
After the haircutting Noah had his special therapist come over. She is a play therapist and main focus is to be language but also to address all his delays. right now she is mainly working on building relationship so she can get him to work with her. Celeste was home for this session and able to take some pics for me! Maria brought BUBBLES!!!!! Noah's firt time ever to see bubbles! :)

He is totally enthralled in this picture! so sweet :)
Now he is into the game and he is holdin the wand!!!

Look at him concentrate!! :) heehee

Maria gets a hug! YIPEEEE! :) so sweet :) I am so blessed to have Maria come out to work with us! She is a doll!!!! :)
Well, I best sleep before he is up!
WE send you blessings and kisses in the wind!
THE WAIT FOR NOAH IS OVER!!!! November 3, 2007~September 8, 2008 First heard about Noah~Noah in our Arms!
April 1, 2009~ June 7, 2010 First committed to Jeremiah~Jeremiah in our Arms!

The FIRST Picture we EVER saw!

The FIRST Picture we EVER saw!
Noah WesLee 5 months old

The First Picture we ever saw of:

The First Picture  we ever saw of:
Jeremiah Harold Sisemore ~1 year

Kisses in the Wind

I hold you in my heart and touch you in my dreams.
You are here each day with me, at least that's how it seems.

I know you wonder where we are... what's taking us so long.
But remember child, I love you so and God will keep you strong.

Now go outside and feel the breeze and let it touch your skin...Because tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind.

May God hold you in His hand until I can be with you.
I promise you, my darling, I'm doing all that I can do.

Very soon, you'll have a family for real, not just pretend.But for tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind.

May God wrap you in His arms and hold you very tight.
And let the angels bring the kisses that I sent to you each night.

When Love Takes You In!