Not flesh of my flesh, nor bone of my bone; but, still miraculously, my own.
Never forget, for a single minute you didn't grow under my heart, but in it.

Saturday, February 7, 2009

Learning, Learning, Appointments, Appointments, and surgery for Panda Boy

Hi all :)

Tomorow marks 5 months exactly since Noah was placed in my arms!! Right now it is 11:28 pm in Taiwan! 5 months ago right now I was goin nutty in a wonderful hotel room WAITING and DREAMING and trying to sleep! lol I would get my dream come true in LESS than 12 hours! WHAT an amazing thing! And now I am awe to sit here hours short of 5 months later and my amazing dream baby boy is playing beside me!!! :) Boy has HE taught me so much! :) And not just him but just in the journey to give him all he needs and take care of him. This past week we have had alot of appointments! Noah is 25 pounds and 33 inches tall. The Pediatrician says he is in the 30th percentile and growing well! Lots of tests were done for our poststudy report that is due at 6 months but has to be done earlier so translation can take place and it will arrive in Taiwan on time! Noah has been doing well with the special therapist from Early Steps program and we are thrilled with Maria! :) I wanted to make sure Noah has every opportunity to be the best he can be so I began seeking out other places and types of therapy to see what needs he might have. I found an amazing place in a nearby city called Little Works in Progress! I LOVE the name! Noah had 3 evaluations there this week! THIS constituted ALOT of learning for Mama! :) Noah has some sensory intergration issues. I had wondered but since he LOVES to be held and cuddled so much had been told most likely he didn't. Well, he does and do not ask me to tell you the type because I can't pronouce alot of what they said much less spell it! heehee but basically my son CRAVES deep touch! He needs to feel to the core. He also craves motion! We have some techniques to do at home for him and he will work at therapy as well. Noah always leans into me even when not in my lap but not just lightly he leans HARD! when I hold him he presses hard. in the bed he will lay pressed right up beside me but it is almost painful cuz he presses so hard. I did not realize these meant anything specific but just kinda thought boys are so much rougher than girls! Noah hits, bites etc but he is smiling and lovey and cuddly when he does this. Also he has to be hurt REALLY bad to cry and even then it is not appropriate for the the injury. He had blood drawn and they moved the needle around in his arm searching for the vein, no tears. Tb test with needle the same. I found this strange but once they started talking about deep touch it made since. They asked questions and I found myself going wow! I feel bad that I was not aware of this and that maybe I am not holding him firmly enough or touching him right but they are teaching us what to do. Another thing they said is to yes use a time out, but for like a mintue or two and then pick him back up with FIRM FIRM hugs! Not to wait a fit out at this point but to leave him a couple minutes and then HUG him and tell him we love him. For now it is more important we get this where he has the touch the needs. She said think about how much you touch and hold a 4 or 5 month old baby! Noah did NOT get that. She did say it was good that it was not worse. Some children with this continue on to the point that they do not like touch at all even though they crave it so they fight you when you are trying to give them what they want in the first place. Noah only does that when he is totally melted down. Anyway so he will begin therapy at Little works in progress for sesory and also for speech! He will only need physcial therapy once a month and mainly she will be teaching me what to do at home! He did really good and picks up well on what we try to teach him. He climbed a couple steps on the plastic slide at therapy alone with just our hand to catch him!! They all seemed to feel he will do very well and be on target and will improve in all areas!

Noah also had an appointment with an ENT(ear, nose and throat specialist) yesterday. It was recommended we have his hearing checked, and also the cartilage of the ear and just the ears in general. Well, the cartilage looks great! so that was a blessing. They do not do the actual hearing tests for pediatrics at this place we went but can have that done later, but they did a test where they can check the movement of the eardrum. They did this test on Noah and actually redid it on one ear and they found that his was flat. basically little or no movement. They said this is most likely from fluid and feel he needs tubes! Mama was NOT happy about the thought of surgery and anesthesia and what if he is allergic and all BUT I have to do what is best for my baby, right? and they say it is like he is hearing underwater. :( very sad. They cannot guarantee that this will help with speech but it couldn't hurt they said. So Noah's is scheduled for surgery Wednesday, February 11th! I am really having a hard time with the thought of giving my baby to this dr. I just met and letting him cut a hole in each ear. I have all these fears of what if it causes deafness, of course the anethesia concern and on and on it goes. Also the biggest thing is they are sayign I can't be with him till he is asleep or when he first wakes. I shake and cry every time I think of that and I NEVER want him to feel like he was taken away from us or we abandoned him. I am planning to really talk to them on surgery day and explain how long he has been here and all he has been through with the transition of adoption and PRAY they will make an exception. I also through a WONDERFUL friend and her hubby who are in the Anesthesia feild know a medication I can request he be given so that he wont remember any of it when it is over. Please be in prayer for Noah and mama and everyone involved!

After our evaluations at Little Works in Progress we went in search of a toddler appropriate park. Our town we actually live in is very small and does not have anything close to our home, but this larger neighboring city does! I was so thrilled to FINALLY after all this time find a park that we can play at and since Noah will be going to Little Works twice a week then we should be able to go quite often if the times all work out and such :) I am quite excited. Below are some pics of our park time :)

I just adore this picture! You can't see Noah's mouth but you can tell in the eyes he is smiling big! :)

My boy loves kisses!
One of the MAIN things I was wanting was a park with baby swings! Here is Noah the FIRST time ever being put in the baby swing!
He was NOT happy about it and was crying. Now he often does this if I put him down ANYWHERE so I kept trying hoping he would decide he liked it!

as you can see he is not thrilled still

so sad! I so wanted him to love it but was not to be for now!
At first he did not want anything to do with anything!
This was so cute! We had tried to walk him up the steps to go slide several times and he would not. He finally saw some other kids play on it and then he decided he wanted to and this is him reaching for my hand to go up!
Here we go climbing up!

Here he is letting me put him on the slide

Ready to go! We do NOT have one of him actually sliding cuz Celeste was too busy making sure she caught him! We will have to do a 3 person trip and have a photo person and a sender and catcher! :) heehee

I CANNOT beleive I am posting this on the net BUT I have been feeling so bad about being so big and cheating Noah out of a thinner younger mom who could do more with him I was determined to PLAY with my baby and show him mama doing stuff! So big as I am I went down the toddler slide! LOL

Noah standing and deciding the park is not too bad!
YUP! He finally did let us put him in the swing BRIEFLY and was happy! Did not last long but still finally my boy is swinging and ALMOST smiling! :)
So adorable! He is watching some bigger kids play!
Time to go! :)

Ok, so this picture has such meaning. I lived in the city where this park is when I was a child, played there as a child, took Celeste there a few times growing up and Bobby has been there as an adult before. to get in and out of the park you have to cross this bridge! So Celeste made a picture of Noah crossing the bridge we have all crossed over the years! :)
Below is a video of Noah working with Maria (early steps special therapist) at our home! He is so funny in part of this with trying to cry! lol not good lighting but thought some might enjoy!
We send you Blessings and Kisses in the Wind!


Sarah k said...

Hey Tami,
I don't like the idea of operation either. Would a second opinion help? Jer also was supposedly needing more "deep touch" and roughness and then I found out that the people saying that don't have kids much rather So now I look at most of what I am told as opinion. I hope that all goes well with you guys hon.
And we will be praying for Noah!! He is such a sweet heart!!! And I love seeing pictures of him!

Sarah k.

lorabelle said...

I believe the tubes will help Noah a great deal Tami. If it helps, all three of my little men have had them and we have had wonderful results. Less ear infections, better hearing and improved speech. I will have you in my thoughts as you well know...
I LOVE the video of Noah during his session. WOW, I can't tell you the flash back that brought back to me. Clayton & I endured many of these sessions... It's funny watching him figure out how to stack those pegs instead of poking them into one another. He's still using the block concept and he will get it figured out soon, You wait and see! what a cutie pie!!! Your park outing looks like you had a blast. Glad that you posted yourself in those shots Tami. You should never feel like you can't!!! You are a beautiful person and a wonderful Mommy and it shows, not only in what you do but how you do it. Your smile really says it all...

Tami and Bobby Sisemore Family said...

Thanks for comments Sarah and Lora! as for the deep touch sarah the therapy and things we are doing are already making a difference and I did some research and it is all valid. Yes boys are rough by nature alot of times, as are some girls I hear tell :) but I will do all I can for Noah and give this a shot and already see a difference so I am sure it is helping him :) Lora you are such a dear dear sweet friend! I love ya girl :) Thanks for being there for me YET again to text and say HELP I am freaking! you and Chris are amazing! Thanks for your sweet words here on the blog too :) What is funny is Noah will NOT do the block stacking! but he stacked the pegs upside down! lol

Expecting Good Things said...

Oh my goodness!! I TOTALLY forgot you texted me yesterday! I was in the middle of getting Breelyn's stitches out when I got it. She was SCREAMING! Did NOT want them touching her. Needless to say I was a little busy. SO SORRY!! I just read the title of your post and realized what happened. Off to read your post now. ugh! I feel bad.

Expecting Good Things said...

Surgery is so scary to a momma. I know but ear tubes are a common thing and do wonders from what I hear. Noah is a tough little guy and I know he'll do just fine. I'm so glad you found a great park to take Noah to. It looks like he had fun! Loved the therapy video. He's doing really great!! Breelyn is working on that peg thing too!

Shannon of "Room for More" said...

What a beautiful day at the park! I love how you have so many memories there! I am sorry about the possible surgery. I will be praying! I look forward to catching up soon. If you've texted me in the last 2-3 weeks, my phone has been in the car in our driveway. Since my cell doesn't work in the house, I leave it in the car. And since we've all been sick for weeks on end, I haven't driven anywhere!

I really loved your park outing pictures, Tami! I love how you stop to enjoy and appreciate the smaller things in a day that otherwise would have just been filled with appointments! I love how you love being a mother again!

The Family K. said...

You are a great mom for seeking out all the help for Noah and making sure he has the resources he needs to take the next steps.

I loved the park pictures. You can really see the love shining through.

I'll pray for Noah as you consider the surgery and all that it involves.

Tiffanie said...

Hi Tami, I will be praying for you as you decide on what is best for Noah. I enjoyed the park pictures. My absolute favorite is the one of the two of you hand in hand walking along the bridge. You are a great Mom to Panda Boy! Hands down.

Tish said...

noah is one tall litle dude! i hear you about your fears in taking him for work on his ears. M had to be put under for a minor procedure, but it is gut wrenching!!! hope all goes well!!!!

THE WAIT FOR NOAH IS OVER!!!! November 3, 2007~September 8, 2008 First heard about Noah~Noah in our Arms!
April 1, 2009~ June 7, 2010 First committed to Jeremiah~Jeremiah in our Arms!

The FIRST Picture we EVER saw!

The FIRST Picture we EVER saw!
Noah WesLee 5 months old

The First Picture we ever saw of:

The First Picture  we ever saw of:
Jeremiah Harold Sisemore ~1 year

Kisses in the Wind

I hold you in my heart and touch you in my dreams.
You are here each day with me, at least that's how it seems.

I know you wonder where we are... what's taking us so long.
But remember child, I love you so and God will keep you strong.

Now go outside and feel the breeze and let it touch your skin...Because tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind.

May God hold you in His hand until I can be with you.
I promise you, my darling, I'm doing all that I can do.

Very soon, you'll have a family for real, not just pretend.But for tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind.

May God wrap you in His arms and hold you very tight.
And let the angels bring the kisses that I sent to you each night.

When Love Takes You In!