Not flesh of my flesh, nor bone of my bone; but, still miraculously, my own.
Never forget, for a single minute you didn't grow under my heart, but in it.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

PEANUT

Tonight I type this through so many tears I can't see. Good thing I type by touch. My beloved Peanut, the best dog on the plante, died today :( I can't believe that I won't ever hold that sweet pup again, or feel his lick or snuggle next me, or him scratchin at the bed for me to put him up. Extreme sadness overwhelms Celeste and I today. Peanut is our family. He has been with Celeste and I through SO many rough times, and he wormed his little way into Bobby's heart when we began courting. Noah was in love with peanut! He would hear his little neck bell jingle and grin and shake with excitement because he knew peanut was coming. Peanut was 11 years old! We got him Thanksgiving Day 1997. I called him my son. This dog would let me rock him like a baby! :) He loved me when noone else did! He was so attached to Celeste and I. PLEASE pray for Celeste. She is totally devestated as am I but she also is the one that found peanut :( We are waiting for Bobby to get off from his 2nd job to come home and bury peanut. I know that not everyone will understand but I am just so so sad and I can't stop crying. It makes me even sadder to think Noah will never remember peanut! He will never know that love that peanut gave us. I just can't believe this really happend. I guess we somehow thougth he would always be with us even though it is impossible. Please pray for me as well because I feel such guilt that I haven't spent the time with peanut I use to lately, that I was the one that had Celeste put him outside earlier because I am tryin to retrain him and just maybe had I let him in when he was barkin instead of leavin him out until after supper then just maybe he would not have died :( It began rainin and got a bit colder during finishing cooking and eating. He was wet and cold :( I feel dreadful but am being told it was his time and he would have died anyway and that dogs go off to die. He was under the steps which was uncommon for him. We had to search for him with a flashlight when he did not come when we called. Celeste was felling guilty cuz she was the one who let him out and felt she should have let him in sooner. This guilt does not help our grief :( What I wouldn't give to have him back for one more day, one more hour. How can my heart be so attached to my dear sweet peanut. There will never be another dog like peanut! He was a toy dauschund. I have never seen another one like him and if I ever do I will HAVE to have it! Here are a few pictures of my peanut! He gave so much to us, to ME, more than he ever ever received. I LOVE YOU PEANUT, You will be GREATLY MISSED!

Peanut Sisemore

Peanut Again

One more picture of Peanut

7 comments:

Paula Perry said...

Gosh i totally feel your pain, i am so sorry for you and will pray for you and your family. I know it doesn't feel it right now but things with feel better with time. oh and try not to feel guilty, i was just his time to go. He had a wonderful life in your family, and it was just his time. Take care
God bless
Paula

momwithfaithandhope said...

Tami, I got your text message last night. I'm so sorry for your loss and I will be praying for you and Celeste. Peanut sure was a cutie, and his name fits him so perfectly. May you find comfort in knowing that Noah got to meet Peanut. Perhaps Peanut's job here on earth was to bring you comfort in dark times, and especially during the emotional wait of bringing Panda boy home. . .Now that Noah is home, Peanut knew he could go in peace.

The Family K. said...

Awwww.... Tami. I'm so sorry for you. Peanut sounds like he was a wonderful dog with a special place in everyone's hearts. It sounds like he was very well loved.

brazzel6 said...

Oh, Tami, I am so sorry! My heart breaks for you after reading your post! I will pray for you all!

{{{{{HUGS}}}}}
Kayla

Lisa said...

Tami,
We too have a very beloved pet who is every bit a part of our family as your Peanut....my heart breaks for you all and I absolutely know how wrenching a loss this is; I'm so sorry!
(((HUGS)))
Lisa C.

June Berger said...

Oh Tami, I don't think you're silly. I'm so sorry for your loss. Please though, neither you or Celeste should feel any guilt, he lived a good life, of that I have NO doubt! Just try to remember all the wonferful times you had with him and praise God He let you keep him for 11 great years! Praying for you all.

The Becks Family said...

Tami,
I'm so so so sorry. You are having such a rough week. Do NOT feel guilty. It's not your or Celeste's fault! It was just his time. He was obviously very loved. Thinking of you!
Holli

THE WAIT FOR NOAH IS OVER!!!! November 3, 2007~September 8, 2008 First heard about Noah~Noah in our Arms!
AND NOW THE WAIT FOR JEREMIAH IS OVER TOO!!!
April 1, 2009~ June 7, 2010 First committed to Jeremiah~Jeremiah in our Arms!

The FIRST Picture we EVER saw!

The FIRST Picture we EVER saw!
Noah WesLee 5 months old

The First Picture we ever saw of:

The First Picture  we ever saw of:
Jeremiah Harold Sisemore ~1 year


Kisses in the Wind

KISSES IN THE WIND
I hold you in my heart and touch you in my dreams.
You are here each day with me, at least that's how it seems.

I know you wonder where we are... what's taking us so long.
But remember child, I love you so and God will keep you strong.

Now go outside and feel the breeze and let it touch your skin...Because tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind.

May God hold you in His hand until I can be with you.
I promise you, my darling, I'm doing all that I can do.

Very soon, you'll have a family for real, not just pretend.But for tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind.


May God wrap you in His arms and hold you very tight.
And let the angels bring the kisses that I sent to you each night.


When Love Takes You In!